The Vision Continued Part III

My Perpetual Help

Through my bitter tears, I prayed for aid and suddenly the mountain began to rumble and rise, and I
feared that I would fall off the side of the mountain. I realized the rumble was the sound of many carvings appearing beneath me, but I could not see what was being written below me. I looked above
me and I saw the most beautiful woman I had ever seen, standing at the top of the mountain. She was
dressed in simple garments and a mantle of white. She stretched out her hands towards me and told me to grab a hold of her. I did as she said and she pulled me up over the cliff and drew me directly into her warm embrace. I dared not ask her who she was, for I already knew that she was Mary, my dear mother and surest refuge. I stayed in her embrace for what seemed like an eternity, and there I wept. As I cried, I felt the weight of a thousand worries being lifted from me, and I became as light as a cloud. Indeed, I became a little child in her arms, so she wrapped me underneath her mantle. I asked her what was being written on the side of the mountain when she was pulling me up over the cliff. She told me that all the names of my friends, family, benefactors, patron saints, indeed the entire communion of saints, all who had journeyed with me, prayed with me and for me, were lifting me up just enough to grab hold of her arms.

This is part three of a seven part project. For the full story click here

The Vision Continued Part II

The Ledge

As I rested from my climb on the ledge, I found in front of me a sheer cliff of solid wall with no footing to help me climb. I was stuck where I was. In huge letters, the word “Pride” carved itself into the wall in front of me and I sat and wept for I could not move on but dared not go back where I was.

This is part two of a seven part project. For the full story click here

The Vision

The Sea Shore

I, received a vision from the Lord of the spiritual journey. I was brought to the shore of a vast ocean. Its waters were unlike those I had ever seen before. Its waters were so still that overwhelming silence
pierced through the air. Towards the horizon, I could see the sun begin its ascent into the clear sky.
Vibrant colors of purple, orange, and teal flooded the sky. The waters began to glisten as the sun rose. It glistened like millions of diamonds, pure crystals, and brilliant sapphires and rubies. Their reflection of the rising sun blinded me so sharply that even when I closed my eyes, the memory of them was still as vivid as when I had had my eyes open. As I peered off towards the distance, I could see an immense mountain of gold leading towards some far off land. I felt within me a deep yearning to climb the mountain and to follow the path towards the land I could not see. But there was an ocean between me and the mountain that I could not cross. I began to cry as my soul groaned within me. As my tears fell into the water, they began to disturb the stillness, making the water move and ripple. Suddenly, a small boat appeared from the misty horizon. It floated directly towards me and stopped on the shore in front of me. It was big enough for me alone and just as it had appeared on its own, so did it take me on its own towards the golden mountain.

This is part one of a seven part project. For the full story click here

Good Good Father of Surprises

V.J.E.

Greetings friends! 

I want to share about a special day that happened back in January.  It was Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, and that morning the Novice Mistress, Mother Jeanette Marie, received a mysterious phone call in which she had the biggest smile on her face.  A few moments later, the doorbell rings, and she asked one of us sisters in formation to answer the door (which is strange because usually if she is near the door, she answers it).  I approach the door and to my surprise I see the head of a very tall man through the window.  It was my close friend (and a friend of the community), Daniel!  I shouted at the top of my lungs as I opened the door.  Of course, everyone came to see why I was screaming in excitement, and they soon joined in the loud greeting!  If the day couldn't get any better, our mutual friend Claude (who is a teacher at our school Our Lady of Mount Carmel) had already planned to come over to the convent that day to record a song with the novices and postulants, so you can only guess how shocked Claude was when he arrived to find his friend Daniel sitting on the couch in the convent community room!  That day of surprises was filled and received with great joy! It was a gift to spend time with my brothers in Christ.

That special day was a wonderful surprise, but sometimes surprises aren't so wonderful. For example, I am learning that one of the less wonderful surprises in the convent is when "my time" is taken away because of unexpected occurrences and circumstances.  But all surprises are given by God.  God gave me the surprise of my friend Daniel coming, but He also gave me the surprise of taking me away from "my time" of doing what "I want."  All surprises require a response to the grace present in the moment.  With Daniel's surprise, I accepted it with great joy, but with the surprise of "my time" taken away, I tend to reject it with sore and stubborn pride.  But this is not my time to take but rather to give totally to God and to serve my community.

God tends to surprise us the more we follow Him.  They come in all sorts of sizes: big, small, occasional, and/or daily.  Sometimes we like the surprises.  Other times we don't appreciate a particular surprise of grace and just want to immediately reject it, complain, and have a grumpy face about it.  How easily do we forget that whatever the Lord gives is meant to bring us closer in relationship with Him?  We must not take for granted the delightful surprises nor must we be closed off to the unpleasant ones.  Rather, we must respond to God's grace in all surprises with great faith, hope, and praise.  We must totally trust Him and choose Him.

As we begin this season of Lent, many surprises will come our way.  Let us cling to Our Mother, Mary, who accepted the biggest surprise of human history.  May she teach us to respond to God's grace in union with His will. Mary, Holy Mother of God, teach us to receive the grace of God with humility and charity.  Most Holy Trinity, give us a pure heart of love.

God of surprises, have mercy on us.
Our Lady of Mercy, pray for us.

"Accept whatever He gives, and give whatever He takes with a big smile. You belong to Him.  Tell Him, I am Yours, and if You cut me to pieces, every single piece will be only all Yours." (Bl. Mother Teresa of Calcutta)

Pictured with the "little sisters" : Daniel (far left), Fr. Scott, O. de M. (back right), Claude (far right)

 Side note: Here is the link to the song we covered with Claude David! Take a listen! :) Good Good Father

Reflection on Reading for Sunday, Nehemiah 8:4-10

V. J. E. 

Dear friends,


I would like to share what came to my mind as I read the readings for this upcoming Sunday, January 24th. Specifically, my attention was drawn to the first reading, which is from Nehemiah 8:4-10. Please join me in reading this passage of Holy Scripture before continuing, and I encourage you to see what the Lord inspires you to reflect on. You can even write it down, as I did. Share it. Here is what I could capture with my pen:

The call to be a teacher is a great one, for every life is a lesson to be taught; every life a lesson to be learned. Every person from the moment of conception has a message to teach, a prophetic cry to be heard! But, how often are we deaf to this cry? How often do we clasp our hands over our ears to avoid even hearing it? Our world cries out to us, our brothers and sisters scream out to us, and often times, in very hidden, even silent ways. We must pray to learn to perceive these cries for help and deliverance. And, what must our response be? Love - a love based on the Eternal Word, in His speech and in His action, in His voice and in His flesh. How can we convey this Word? 

Firstly, by learning how to be teachable; to become teachable. We must always see ourselves as students, ready and eager to learn from the "least" of our brothers and sisters. Secondly, we must take what little we know of Truth and make it accessible to all, as it is. Jesus was not a contortionist. He did not seek to slip into different molds in order to fit into what was socially acceptable or what would've been "nice" for His audience. As a great teacher taught me, there is a difference between what is "good" and what is "nice". Jesus was who He was, and He was at peace with that. Still is. Truth is. On the other hand, we cannot forget that Jesus was and is the most sensitive of men, "a man full of sorrows" (Isaiah 53:3b). No man ever knew man's needs as well as Jesus. He did not water down His message; instead, He brought all people to the source of it, the well-spring of life, by meeting them where they were and calling them to greatness. We must pray to imitate Jesus in this way - to learn how to proclaim the Eternal Word in all that we say and do. And, when it is time for us to teach, let us fight any temptation to see ourselves as above the listener. We are only handing on what we have received, and how much of a mess we can make of that! Rather, let us see ourselves as lifting up the other, the one who is indeed on the same plane as us by virtue of his or her human dignity, to contemplate the Face of God. 

It is only by first seeing ourselves in the proper perspective that we can truly begin to do good. It is only by learning how to listen to the voice of the Lord that we can begin to decipher the voices of our brothers and sisters, and it is only by learning from our brothers and sisters that we can begin to hear the voice of God. Jesus, the greatest of teachers, was the greatest of students. Let us remember too that "no disciple is greater than his master" (Matt 10:24a).



St. Philip Neri, blessed teacher and student of Divine Love, pray for us. 


In His Love,
Sr. April Marie
Novice

Humanity Invades the Convent

Liturgically, December 28th is the feast of the Holy Innocents--remembering all the infant boys two and under who were murdered under King Herod's command.  We remember the first martyrs of the Church, who unknowingly witnessed to the faith in Christ unto death. Children are beautifully pure and innocent--they speak what is on their minds, they seemingly have no concept of who is watching as they express how they are feeling at any time of the day, but they also play with you and warm your soul with smiles and hugs and sheer joy.  In Mexico, this day is remembered for the innocence of children in that playful characteristic.  Similar to our April 1st day tradition, the Mexican culture plays pranks on this day to always remember our call to be childlike.  The Mercedarian Sisters of the Blessed Sacrament were founded in Mexico, thereby our sisters here in Cleveland continued the tradition and enjoyed this day at the expense of the pride of one said postulant (all in good fun).

The details aren't as important here about how said prank happened (see below if interested in the whole story), but what is essential to notice is the humanity found within the person of a Religious and one seeking such a state in life.  We are human, and enjoy a good

laugh as much as anyone.  God longs to give us the desire of our hearts--which, at the root, is the same no matter what vocation you may be called to; holiness and happiness.  He wants all of us to be happy; and loving jokes between sisters are just one of the many ways we can live out this holiness and happiness.

Yet humanity knows that not every day can be so innocent and carefree, with the world exists hardships and pain--with a purpose though.  In the midst of these trials, we are drawn to cling more tightly to someone who understands our weakness.  Christ best empathizes with our crosses for He models that when we fall, we get back up and persevere.  We are never alone on this journey but are supported physically at times and at other times spiritually through another's prayers.  These crosses do not define or conquer us, but rather help us to recognize our great need for a Savior and His ceaseless Mercy.

My joy stems from the depth of a heart united to my Lord who took on flesh in order to redeem my sins through a death He didn't deserve.  I can be nothing but grateful for this endless grace of mercy--"Only when I discover [God] loves me in spite of all my infidelities, when I really discover the mercy of God to me, only then shall I discover the true, compassionate face of Jesus:  only then shall I discover that I was a captive, I was the oppressed.  He comes to break the yoke (Jean Vanier)."

My dear brothers and sisters, I beg you during this Jubilee Year of Mercy to CELEBRATE as we approach the end of the Christmas season and begin Ordinary Time.  There is nothing 'ordinary' about everyday waking up with the intention to be charitable to those you encounter.  There is nothing 'ordinary' about boldly standing up against an injustice at your work.  There is nothing 'ordinary' about choosing to give of your time to those in need.  And these 'ordinary' tasks of daily life are how we are called to live as children of God.  May we rejoice like children in the little moments of each day where we encounter the hidden Christ. Hardships may come but I promise you they will also go. Thirst for the more that is found in the manger, in the Monstrance, on the cross.  It is there, my friends, where we are free to climb into the arms of our Savior, as a little child in need, and smile, because we are safe! United on the Altar of Sacrifice, I'll see you in the Eucharist.

Prank Story:
The sisters have come to realize that I know a lot of people all over the world--thanks be to God for beautiful friendships.  When I returned on December 28th from one of our usual afternoon walks to the lake, I was told by our Superior that my sister had taken a message for me and it was urgent, so I was given permission to call them back.  I anxiously received the note with an area code I was unfamiliar with (that is not unusual for me), so I randomly called 'mystery number' back.

To my dissatisfaction, the voicemail was a generic recording, 'you have reached this 7-digit number...'.  I proceeded to explain who I was, I had received this message to call back urgently, and left the best times to reach me in which our schedule would not conflict (again, anyone who knows me can attest to my thorough messages).  I looked up where the area code was from to help me try and figure out who was calling and recognized that I knew someone who lives in the area of the number.

I did worry (I know, what good does it do Marianne to worry), but then I brought the people to prayer.  God saved me from an extra dose of humility by keeping my prayer silent instead of vocalizing it at Vespers.  The phone rang as dinner was beginning and the sister who answered asked if I could have permission to take it immediately, which I was granted. I went into the community room excited to solve the mystery when a women's voice I did not recognize came through on the other end.  My brain began to think of every person I knew or knew that I was entering, but no voice was connecting with a name.  The conversation got awkward as I began apologizing for not knowing whom I was speaking to even though she explained how she has seen my picture on Facebook; I was clueless, wanting to rejoin my community at dinner and hoping to offer more time to figure out who I was talking to--I should have known by now something was up.  I politely inquired if I could call her back later when I hear an echo down the hallway in her response saying, 'no, I'll be busy the rest of the night'. One of our sisters was on her cell phone (from when she lived in one of our other houses in the states), laughing.  They got me so good!  I walk back into dinner where my other sisters in initial formation has been told about the prank and we just all laughed and shared in the joy of each other.  Thanks be to God for the humanity that is found within the convent!

Setting the Captive Within Our Own Hearts Free

Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, truly present in the Holy Eucharist, I place all my trust in You! 

The devotion to the Sacred Heart is very near and dear to, well, my own heart! It was in silent Eucharistic Adoration where Jesus offered me His Heart. He only asked for love in return. Doesn’t it blow your minds that Jesus’ Sacred Heart is present in the Eucharist, burning with mercy and love for us awkward, little humans?! Reflect on this for a moment!

Jesus gives Himself completely to us in the Eucharist and He only asks for our love in return. Oftentimes it is very difficult for us to return Jesus’ total and self-giving love with our own feeble love. Why is this? Well, may I suggest that it may be because we are captives within our own hearts. 

The late psychologist, Carl Jung, illustrates what I am trying to get at in the following reflection:

To accept oneself as one may sound like a simple thing, but simple things are always the most difficult things to do. In actual life to be simple and straightforward is an art in itself requiring the greatest discipline, while the question of self-acceptance lies at the root of the moral problem and at the heart of a whole philosophy of life. 

Is there ever a doubt in my mind that it is virtuous for me to give alms to the beggar, to forgive him who offends me, yes, even to love my enemy in the name of Christ? No, not once does such a doubt cross my mind, certain as I am that what I have done unto the least of my brethren, I have done unto Christ. 

But what if I should discover that the least of all brethren, the poorest of all beggars, the most insolent of all offenders, yes, even, the very enemy himself---that these live within me; that I myself stand in need of the alms of my own kindness, that I am to myself the enemy who is to be loved--what then?

The whole Christian truth is turned upside down; then there is no longer any question of love and patience; then we say “Raca” to the brother within us; then we condemn and rage against ourselves! For sure, we hide this attitude from the outside world, but this does not alter the fact that we refuse to receive the least among the lowly in ourselves with open arms. And if it had been Christ himself to appear within ourselves in such a contemptible form, we would have denied him a thousand times before the cock crowed even once. 

You see, when we do not accept ourselves as we are, even in our woundedness and with all our faults (St. Therese calls this our “littleness”), we become obstacles to God’s love. We become captives within our own hearts because we have become self-centered instead of God-centered. Because of our fallen human nature, we have the tendency to fixate on ourselves and on our various pains and sufferings instead of giving God the primacy in our lives. 

In 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, St. Paul tells his little community, “Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. In all circumstances give thanks, for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.” Retraining our sinful hearts to see God in everyone and everything, and consequently living in joyful adoration, allows God to transform our hearts into a Heart like His! God is the only one who can sanctify us; we cannot sanctify ourselves. 

During this sanctification process, we recognize our nothingness before God, who is EVERYTHING. This is where we need to humble ourselves and accept God’s merciful love. By accepting God’s love, we are better able to love Him in return. The whole devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus arose because people were rejecting His love!

Now, let us take a look at a journal entry from a 23 year-old seminarian right before his diaconate ordination:

Every time I hear anyone speak of the Sacred Heart of Jesus or of the Blessed Sacrament I feel an indescribable joy. It is as if a wave of precious memories, sweet affections and joyful hopes swept over my poor person, making me tremble with happiness and filling my soul with tenderness. These are loving appeals from Jesus who wants me wholeheartedly there, at the source of all goodness, his Sacred Heart, throbbing mysteriously behind the Eucharistic veils….

Today everything which concerns the Sacred Heart of Jesus has become familiar and doubly dear to me. My life seems destined to be spent in the light irradiating from the tabernacle, and it is to the heart of Jesus that I must look for a solution of all my troubles. I feel as if I would be ready to shed my blood for the cause of the Sacred Heart. My fondest wish is to be able to do something for that precious object of my love. At times the thought of my arrogance, of my unbelievable self-love and of my great worthlessness alarms and dismays me and robs me of my courage, but I soon find reason for comfort in the words spoken by Jesus to Blessed Margaret Alacoque: “I have chosen you to reveal the marvels of my heart, because you are such an abyss of ignorance and insufficiency.”

Ah! I wish to serve the Sacred Heart of Jesus, today and always. I want the devotion to his Heart, concealed within the sacrament of love, to be the measure of all my spiritual progress. The conclusion of my resolutions during the holy Exercises is in my desire henceforth to do all that I have been trying to do till now in intimate union with the Sacred Heart of Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament.

-Angelo Roncalli…….a.ka. Pope St. John XXIII

See how the future pope and Saint turned away from himself and accepted Jesus’ love despite his “littleness?” This is what we are all called to do! Most of us will not become the pope, but we can all become saints. 

May the Heart of Jesus in the most Blessed Sacrament be praised, adored, and loved with grateful affection, at every moment in all the tabernacles of the world, even to the end of time. Amen. 

In Christ’s Love, 

Sr. Katie Marie